All About Events

We're Engaged! Now what??

2012-01-30T07:15:00.000-08:00

The most popular time of year for engagements is upon us. New Year's Eve, Christmas, and Valentine's Day bring out the romance in men, I guess. The next wave of engagements will be the practical, planner-types who are graduating from college and pop the question in cap and gown. No matter when the engagement happens, your next few months will be filled with questions from friends and family, bombarding you with when, where and how. To get you started, here are some helpful tips for making the process of getting married in New Orleans easier:

If at all possible, pick your venue first, then your date. For example, if you know what season you want (the most popular dates for outdoor weddings in New Orleans are in October and November, then March, April and May for those that don't mind an indoor option), then search for venues you like and ask them what weekends they have available. Choose from those dates. Remember, most brides start planning a year or more in advance, so if you're less than a year out, your dates may be more limited.
Keep an open mind about the day of the week if you want to save some money on venue rental fees. Many locations give discounts or lift restrictions for Friday and Sunday weddings.
If you have guests coming in from out of town, check the convention calendar before you commit to a date. If there is a convention or event in town that is expecting more than 20,000 people in attendance, the hotel industry calls this a "city wide", in which the major hotel chains jack up their rates and start requiring 2 and 3 night minimums. The NOMCVB will check up to three dates for a bride who calls in directly. You can also call any Hilton, Marriott, or similar hotel in the downtown area and simply ask for a wedding room block quote for the weekend you're considering. If there is a city wide on those dates, the rooms will be expensive or not available at all. Many hotels rule out wedding blocks during major conventions and events.
Create a wedding website before you send out a save the date. When you are planning a destination wedding, especially, people will rely on the website for hotel information, tips to navigating the city, and wedding agendas. When you're a local, this is the best way to share your gift registry, which can never be included in wedding invitation or save the date mailings. Free websites are easily found on most wedding sites, but I find that the simplest templates with the shortest URLs (without all the letters and numbers you see in some web addresses) are on www.weddingwire.com. Choose an address that's easy to remember, like your two first or last names, and use the wedding date or a significant word as a password. You don't have to have the whole website complete by the time the save the date goes out, but you do want to include your website address in the mailing.
Pick your venue before your pick your dress if you want more location options. The wedding dress sets the tone for the entire event. If you choose a formal location, you'll probably want a formal dress. If you choose a more comfortable feeling space, you may want to go with a more simple style of gown. Your invitation will follow along with whatever tone you choose, giving guests the first idea of what the wedding attire will be. The more formal the invitation, the more formal the dress code.
Send save the dates out up to one year in advance. The save the date does not have to match the wedding invitation, so this is your chance to have a little fun. Postcard save the dates are an inexpensive alternative. Create your own or use picture postcards from your wedding destination city.
When you create your guest list, include phone numbers. Once your RSVP deadline (30 days before is my go-to RSVP date) passes, you'll want to call each of the guests that did not respond, or have a family member or friend call, so that you can get an accurate guest count for catering and venue needs. When I make these calls for my clients, I say something like "The bride and groom didn't receive your RSVP, so they're worried that you didn't receive your invitation." This gives the guest the chance to RSVP without feeling like they've been rude by not responding on time. Usually they admit that they forgot or simply answer yes or no.

These few helpful hints will save you a lot of headache as your start your plan. If the process seems overwhelming, call All About Events to handle it for you! :)

Photo courtesy of www.bestofneworleans.com and Scriptura

I Ate WHAT??

2011-10-14T07:04:00.000-07:00

I ate WHAT???...

Last year, my friend, Terese, came in town for her first visit to New Orleans from California. Being an avid lover of all things New Orleanian, she had a “to-do” list of things she wanted to experience during her trip. The list read as follows:

· Eat Jambalaya

· Eat a Shrimp Po-Boy

· Eat a Roast Beef Po-boy

· Eat Crawfish Etouffee

· Eat a Hubigs Pie

· Eat Red Beans and Rice

· Eat Beignets

· Drink a Hurricane

We spent several days checking off items on her list, researching and polling locals to find out who made the best of each dish. I proudly gave her the brief histories I knew of the city and its quirky culture, determined to prove that life here is better.

On a recent return visit to New Orleans (her third trip now), Terese’s list, much shorter than the last, started and ended with a “Surf and Turf” Po-Boy from Parkway Bakery. We went straight from the airport to the restaurant and got there at 9:30pm, just in the nick of their 10pm closing time. I’d never been there at that hour before, when the noisy, busy wonderfulness of the lunch and dinner scenes died down. The place had a few locals, leisurely wrapping up their current meals and chatting about the next, as New Orleanians always do. The employees had a moment to chat as they joked around with us and didn’t give even one indication of being annoyed that we came in so late. One man in particular, a manager perhaps, came outside to our table for a chat, bringing us each an official Parkway Bakery paper hat, which we proudly wore throughout the rest of our meal. I beamed as I watched her eyes light up over the enormous bread as she took her first bite and was once again proud of my city and its unique heritage.

We mentioned to the manager that Terese was from out of town and that this was her first request when she got off the plane. I’m sure he’d heard this before, but he didn’t show it as he welcomed her back. She told him how much she loved it.

“I don’t know what it is,” she said, “but you can’t get this kind of sandwich in LA.”

“You know, I’ll let you in on a secret…,” the manager replied. We sat, Po-Boys in mid-air, holding our breath as we waited for him to tell us the secret recipe for the coveted roast.

And then, in just eight short words, he shattered my illusion of all that is uniquely New Orleans. “It’s just Yankee pot roast on French Bread!”

My reaction to this statement was one I did not expect. Aside from practically spitting out my food, I felt slightly insulted and a little embarrassed. Here I was, bragging about our local flavor and how you just can’t create it in the same way anywhere else. And here was this guy, elaborating on a common recipe that any Yankee with a pot and a clove of garlic could throw together. It was as if my Southern Belle ancestors had taken over my body at the sound of the word “Yankee.” I hastily searched for an excuse. Being a considerably below-average cook, I couldn’t argue the recipe. So I threw out the first thing that came into my head.

“It’s the bread!” I spat out, a little too loudly. “The bread is different here because of the humidity and the water.” I was unable to fathom, let alone accept, that one of my favorite local dishes wasn’t local at all.

I knew at least some part of that statement was true, but didn’t go on because I was really just trying to change the subject back to our one-of-a-kindness and away from the dreaded Yankees.

After Terese left, I decided to look up the history of the Po-Boy. To my relief, the most informative site, www.poboyfest.com/history, said nothing about the Yanks. While the recipe for an authentic roast beef Po-Boy was not specified, the article explains that the first sandwich of its kind was created by two Cajun brothers who relocated to New Orleans to open a French Market coffee stand. During an unsuccessful streetcar drivers’ strike in 1929, the Martin Brothers offered free food to any union streetcar driver. The popular campaign brought out-of-work, empty-pocketed members of Division 194 to the stand daily. To keep up with the demand, the brothers partnered with a nearby baker, John Gendusa, to create a 40-inch loaf of bread, rectangular from end to end, that would yield a 20 inch half-loaf sandwich, feeding more workers than its pointy-ended, 30 inch predecessor.

Bennie Martin said, "We fed those men free of charge until the strike ended. Whenever we saw one of the striking men coming, one of us would say, 'Here comes another poor boy.'”

You know the rest…

And so, while I accept that my favorite Po-Boy shop’s recipe is of….ahem…northern influence, I sit proudly at their table, paper hat atop my head, knowing that, while “they” may have claim to the flavor of the meat, we’re the ones who made it better by putting it on the bread—our bread…the humid bread made with our very own water!

2011-09-23T12:54:00.000-07:00

The House Party Checklist

I think its pretty much a given that I love to throw parties. For a living, I throw the big events, but off the clock, I love to have people over to my house for BBQ’s, House Parties, and Game Nights. I noticed, at one of my recent gatherings, that I have a sort-of ritual that I do before each event at home. Thought I’d share this with you in hopes to make your party planning stress-free!
J You're welcome to add your own tips and tidbits!

Make sure the dish washer is empty so that you can fill it easily after the party
Refill the toilet paper roll and make sure that there are extra rolls easily accessible to guests
Have paper towels available for quick clean-ups
Have disposable containers and plastic bags on hand for guests to take leftovers to-go
Create a party music mix with 60 songs per 3-hour window. If music isn’t your forte, invite guests in advance to vote on the songs they’d like to hear at the party using SongVote www.songvote.com
Do yourself a favor and use disposables if the party is not a sit-down dinner. There are lots of fun, affordable options at Party City, Target, Wal-Mart and even Sam’s Club/Costco
Think out the vase! Even just a centerpiece on the food table will create the ambiance of the party. Try something other than flowers, like in this year, when the centerpiece for my Memorial Day party was a New Orleans Second Line Umbrella and red, white, and blue boas.
Set the table early! The night before or morning of the party, place empty serving dishes on the food table to make sure you have enough room for everything and a dish or container and a serving utensil for each item. Drinks can go on a different table or even in a different room. I often put the drinks in the kitchen where ice is easily accessible.
Seating: Make sure you have chairs spread throughout the party location, enough for at least 60% of the guests, unless the party is strictly a cocktail party, in which case you should have plenty of open space for mingling and spontaneous flash mob dancing. (What? It happens at my parties all of the time!)
If there’s a big crowd at your party, consider hiring someone to help keep the food and drink replenished, to tidy up throughout the night, and to help you clean up after the party is over. There’s nothing worse than waking up to a big smelly mess of party aftermath...ok maybe there's worse stuff, but it still sucks to wake up to that.
Take out the trash just before guests arrive and remember to put in a new bag. Keep extra bags handy and visible. Guests will usually help out by tying up a bag and putting in a new one if bags are easy to find. If you recycle, make sure the bins are out in the open. There are some really cute disposable trash bins at Party City: http://www.partycity.com/search.do?query=trash+bin
If people are going to have trouble parking, make sure they have instructions in advance and consider using signage outside if its feasible.

If you have any other good pre-party planning tips, add them to the list by posting a comment!

And don’t forget to share the love by subscribing and re-posting to your favorite social media outlet!J

Special Thanks...

2011-08-20T13:39:00.000-07:00

I just received this lovely thank you from the Mother of the Bride from the August 6th wedding of Nadia and DJ. Thank you to my fantastic staff for helping me create yet another successful event. It's what we're "All About..."

Dear Carolyn,

From the very start, you demonstrated savvy business-like abilities while adding an extra special "personal ability". Your in-depth knowledge and experience of all facets of weddings and receptions, along with your great selection of vendors, and your many contacts, proved to be the foundation and success of our wedding celebration!

Even when personal issues came up, you were invaluable in steering everyone back on track. On the BIG Day, You and your many capable assistants, guided all of us through the schedule of events and appointments and we are thrilled with the final results! I don't think I have ever seen a happier bride or more fun wedding!

Thank you also for all those other moments when you held my hand when I needed it, reassured me, and walked all of us through our many visits to New Orleans. I also greatly appreciate you offering us the use of your home, driving us all over NOLA, taking us to the airport, and doing anything and everything you could to help us through so many months of planning for the Grande Finale!!

So, Carolyn, I am forever grateful to you for our treasured memories and experiences throughout the planning of our wedding celebration! It was, and YOU are, SPECTACULAR!!!

Sincerely,

Lisa Shaaban
Mother of the Bride

What songs NOT to play at a wedding:

2011-07-30T14:07:00.000-07:00

This month's blog is a shout out to my very talented and oh so unique friend, Chris Finney. I recently got a text message from from him. It said "The next chapter in our book needs to be "what songs NOT to play at a wedding." This was followed by some hilarious follow-up texts back and forth of songs ranging from mildly suggestive to wildly inappropriate. Trying to think of funny tunes to text got me thinking of real-life moments when the song selection made me cock my head ("huh?"), bite my lip ("yikes!") and drop my jaw ("they did NOT just play that!").
For example, at a wedding where I was doing Day-Of Services, the bride and groom had picked a rather popular cover band, known for playing gigs on Bourbon Street and in music clubs around town. I knew some of the players from back in my performing days, and I looked forward to hearing how they would do in hopes of adding them to my referral list. My sister, Alison, Event Manager extraordinaire, was there assisting me. As we stood next to each other in the back of the ballroom looking for an opportunity to perfect imperfections and prevent disasters, we had a moment when the world seemed to stop. The band, that I so wanted to love, invited the well-dressed, tasteful mothers of the bride and groom up on stage and proceeded to challenge the two to a "Shake that Ass" contest. Our jaws dropped as the two drunkenly turned their backs to the stage and shook what their Mama's gave them. That moment was one of few in my life when I just stood there, speechless. The mortified feeling turned into uncontrollable giggles between my sister and me. You know...the kind of giggles you get when you're so embarrassed for the other person but secretly glad it's not your fault?
Another perfect example of "funnier in theory than in practice" happened with one of my favorite brides. In a phone conversation she asked me, "Do you Know that Movie Coming to America?" "Of Course!," I replied. "I've always wanted to be able to recreate that fantastic dance number from the wedding scene at one of my themed events." I assumed her next statement would be something about the dress the bride wore in the scene or maybe a decor element that she wanted to incorporate since it's her favorite movie. "What do you think," she asked, "of me walking down the aisle to She's Your Queen to Be?" ...[silence as a try to decide if she's serious, then realize she is]..."I'm not sure that's such a great idea," I replied. As she tried to convince me of how funny it would be, I explained that not everyone would get it--especially not Grandma. I reminded her of the lyrics: "Completely free from infection, to be used at your discretion." She laughed, agreed, and asked if we could have an instrumental version of it. I channeled my mother's soothing tone as I answered, "Oh honey...No."
I don't like to disappoint my brides, especially when they have such great attitudes, so I even suggested having the acoustic guitar player insert a riff from the song, as a little inside joke, thinking those that were in on it would laugh and those that weren't would be none the wiser. Eventually the bride backed down and agreed to a more traditional entrance. Still wanting her to get everything she wanted from her wedding experience, I decided to surprise her on her rehearsal day with a singer who, when she walked up the aisle as her practice run, belted out the song in fabulous falsetto, just like the guy in the movie. As she walked, I was stand-in for her father. She looked at me, beaming with laughter and said, "Carolyn, you know my heart." That turned out to be one of my favorite wedding moments. (Love you, Brandi ☺)
Now I don't want you to think that I don't support unique musical choices for weddings. My absolute favorite father-daughter dance in all the years I've been doing this happened just this past Memorial Day, when another one of my fav brides and her Dad did their own little rendition of the twist scene from Pulp Fiction, which then transitioned into all of the guests joining them on the dance floor for Let's Dance by Chris Montez. Then in her backyard, Atlanta wedding, my cousin walked up the aisle to instrumentals from The Beatles. I love doing things that are out of the ordinary...when done well.

Photo Credit: Bill Arthurs

So to make things easy for those brides that are trying to decide if they want Stand by Your Man to be their wedding song, let's come up with a list of songs together that should NOT be played at a wedding. I'll start:
1. Strokin' (Have you ever listened the words to that song???)
2. Desperado
3. I Will Survive

Now you...

Caketastrophe!

2011-05-22T10:41:00.000-07:00

Over the 19+ years I've been doing events and weddings, I have only twice had this happen...a rascal child with a penchant for adventure and an inquiring mind decides to take it upon him or herself to search for answers to life's most challenging questions in his or her personal moment....is that cake real and what will happen if I stick my finger in it??

The first time this occurred was during a 50th birthday party. The cake was designed to look like the controls in the cockpit of the birthday boy's private plane. Tara's Cakes in Hattiesburg, Mississippi did an amazing job! Even the adults thought it was fake. But one little girl of about 8 years old decided that her mother's words of confirmation of it's edibility were not enough. She had to find out for herself, by not only sticking her little finger into the icing, but by also inserting little sword picks from the hors d'oeuvres into the cockpit dash. I caught the little scoundrel just in time, before she moved to a more obvious positioning than the back of the cake, and was able to hide the tiny marks rather easily in the fondant icing with no one the wiser. (You can see pictures of this fabulous event on my website http://www.allboutevents.net/ under "Themed Events" and "John's 50th Birthday".)

Normally I'm a pretty good "fireman" when it comes to fast fixes to event dilemmas, but when this weekend's cake catastrophe occurred, I had to consult the expert. During my setup time on Friday afternoon for my client's wedding Friday night at the Benachi House and Gardens, another bride was having her rehearsal for her Saturday night wedding. This is common and had been cleared through my bride and through me. The Saturday bride's party was outside practicing their ceremony on the porch. They had a lovely and well-spoken 10 year old flower girl who was the picture of innocence with her lovely, long, red hair. She and I had a charming little chat about what I was doing with a microphone and stand, at the end of which she asked me for the location of the restroom. I gladly directed her inside the house and went about my business. A few hours later, when the groom arrived to take photos, his first comment was "I don't think the bride is going to be happy when she sees that cake." I was shocked, since the cake was exactly how she'd designed, with it's Tiffany blue buttercream icing and decorative peacock feathers. I asked him why he thought she'd be upset and he said "Somebody stuck their fingers in it."

I can't really describe to you my reaction. It was a combination of "everything is going to be just fine" and "I'm going to drop kick that kid!" Of course, I wouldn't really drop kick a 10 year old. They're way to big. But nonetheless, my face spoke volumes, I'm sure. I checked the damages. There they were....two little poke marks right in the center of the front of the cake. Despite my beginner cake decorating classes, I was unable to salvage the smooth texture of the icing with a wet knife, as I remembered (incorrectly) was the quick fix. So I called the baker, Wendy from Just Cake by Wendy in New Orleans, and begged her to return with some magic. While she did her best to work something out, she could not get back to me in time. However, she was still able to save the day over the phone with the following fantastic and unexpected solution: Viva Paper Towels.
The situation was in my highly caffeinated, shaky, hands. To fix the smooth texture of the buttercream, I was instructed to use that particular brand, which has a thick, even texture and no pattern to its design, and a flat spatula to smooth out the surface of the cake. I had a cake spatula from my class and use the Viva towels normally, so this solution was a piece of cake! (ugh..shameless pun intended). I ripped a single sheet of paper towel into a small manageable square and lightly placed it on the damaged spot. Then I took my cake spatula and very gently "iced" back and forth the areas, alternating from the top of the tier to the side to make sure the icing didn't all squish to one area. It took multiple smoothings, but the results were practically perfect! Check out the two photos below to see the damaged area (after my failed attempt to fix it with a knife) and then the finished product (with strategically placed feather decoration):

So the moral of this story is...Keep those kids away from the cake! When all else fails, Viva los papertowel! (and spatula and decorative accent ☺)

“There’s no such thing as a married monogram…”

2011-04-20T10:38:00.000-07:00

…or so etiquette says. Margaret Jones, owner of Scriptura in New Orleans, aficionado of all things cordial and one of my favorite people in the world, gave me the DL on monograms after I received a lot of inquiries about putting them on invitations. Here is the gist of it:

If you’re going with traditional etiquette, a monogram is only for one person. It has three initials, the center initial is for the last name and is usually larger than the other two. The letter on the left is the first name initial and the letter on the right is the middle name initial.
The big scandal comes in when we get into married vs. single couples. Again, if you want to go traditional, there is no such thing as a combined monogram. The history of the monogram stems from back when royalty could rule a country without the prerequisite of being literate. (come to think of it, I’m not sure that is a prerequisite now). Back in the day not many people knew how to write their names. Royalty needed a way to mark proclamations and decrees, so they would design fancy logos using their initials and create an emblem which would be used to represent their signatures. Hence the single name. To give a traditional monogrammed gift to a married couple, such as towels or bathrobes, you would get two and put the man’s monogram on one and the woman’s married monogram on the other—sort of a fancy way of saying “his” and “hers”.

That brings us to the question of the married woman’s monogram. Before the wedding the monogram of a woman would be the same as above: first initial, last name larger, middle initial. However, once the woman gets married, she drops her middle name and her maiden name takes its place. Then the monogram becomes first initial on the left, married name initial larger in the center, maiden name initial on the right. In the case of a wedding invitation, the bride’s maiden name monogram should be the only one used. The married name monogram should not be seen until after the couple is actually married, usually on a thank you note (stay tuned for more wacky fun with thank you note etiquette in a future blog post.)

So why do we see so many combined initial monograms floating around on http://www.theknot.com/ and other wedding related sites? Because the modern idea is to throw out the etiquette of traditional format and do whatever you think works. Currently, combined monograms, while still technically incorrect, are being more widely accepted and used. (That still does not mean you can use it on a wedding invitation!) If you’re going to go with the new frame of mind on this, the bride’s first initial goes on the left (ladies first), the married name initial in the center, and the groom’s first initial on the right.

Many thanks to Margaret the Great for putting her stamp on this information. Visit her at her fabulous shop, Scriptura on Magazine St. in New Orleans or go online and check out their stock at http://www.scriptura.com/ Tell her I sent you :)

New Orleans Wedding Gift Bags

2011-03-09T22:08:00.000-08:00

When planning for your welcome gifts and gift bags for a Destination New Orleans wedding or party, there are some unique local choices in items you can include to really make the guests feel special. Some choices in various price ranges are included in this post. I've also included some items that should be a part off every welcome gift and some items I've included when couples are from other cities. Its important to include personal touches in your gift bags. If you have the budget, include local New Orleans items as well as items from your home town(s) to make your guests feel welcome and show them that, although you chose New Orleans as your even location, you're still representing your roots. I'd love to read your comments! Let me know your great ideas and insights on welcome bags and clever gifts for your guests.

Gift Bag Options

GENERAL ITEMS

WELCOME LETTER

MAP

WALKING TOUR MAP/TOUR BOOKS

AGENDA OF EVENT

BOTTLED WATER

EVIAN FACE SPRAY

LINEN WATER SPRAY

BATH SALTS

POSTCARD W/STAMP

EYE MASK

EAR PLUGS

AAE UMBRELLA

NEW ORLEANS

ZAPP’S POTATO CHIPS

MINI AUNT SALLY’S PRALINES

HUBIG’S PIES

COMMUNITY COFFEE 1CUP PODS

COMMUNITY COFFEE 2OZ BAG

VOODOO DOLL

ORLEANS VOTIVE CANDLE

FLEUR DE LIS MAGNET

CHICAGO

GARRETT’S POPCORN SM BAG (1) 3.00

NEW HAMPSHIRE

MAPLE SYRUP

SAN FRANCISCO

GHIRARDELLI CHOCOLATE

SAN JUAN, PR

MINI BACCARDI RUM
TRADIONAL PAVA HAT

CONTAINER OPTIONS

FABRIC TOTE

GIFT BOX

GIFT BAG

TO-GO BOXES

HAT BOX

Wedding and Baby Shower Etiquette

2011-02-27T20:44:00.000-08:00

http://www.allaboutevents.net/
I remember growing up and going to bridal and baby showers. They were mostly the same when I was a little girl. I'd go with my mom and I'd always look up at the guest of honor and think about being the center of attention like that one day. I loved seeing all the pretty presents wrapped in themed paper and the ladies chatting and eating tiny food. My favorite part was always the sherbet punch. I liked lime the best.

Then when I got older, I learned that there were some showers to which only big girls get invited. These showers were much more...entertaining. :)

The one thing that I've noticed recently--maybe within the last 5-10 years--is that people are throwing etiquette out the window when it comes to shower planning. There are some basic rules that I've found people breaking right and left for both baby showers and bridal showers alike.

The #1 faux pas in shower planning is when a family member, or even a bride or mom-to-be, throws the shower themselves. Etiquette tells us that its rude to ask for presents. That becomes more and more difficult as the gift registry becomes more and more popular, but there are still ways to throw a proper shower and follow the social rules of etiquette. Hence, rule #1:

Bridal showers are supposed to be thrown by friends, coworkers, or extended family members. That means all you brides and mothers-to-be out there can't throw your own shower. Your mom can't do it either. You're on the fence if its thrown by a sister, but you're safe if its your cousin or your aunt. Traditionally a bride gets several showers during the time leading up to her wedding. An expectant mother may get 2 or 3. A bride's "friends shower" is usually thrown by the maid of honor or by the bridesmaids as a group. The "family" shower is thrown by an extended family member. Baby showers are thrown by the best friend, the future Godparent, or a close, but not immediately related, member of the family.

Another thing that I've noticed is the size of showers these days. I can't express the level of boredom everyone goes through watching someone else open 180 presents and then passing them around the room to oooh and aahh with Aunt Vera on one side of you and the 11 year old boy who's mother couldn't find a sitter on the other. If you have to give the guest of honor a break from opening presents to grab a quick piece of cake, your shower is too big. This leads me to Rule #2:

Keep showers small. As I mentioned in Rule #1, the honoree should have several showers throughout the process of getting ready for the big day. Typically, a bride, for example, will have a shower with her girl friends (this is usually a lingerie shower or something fun like that), a family shower (this can be one where a general registry, kitchen shower, etc works best). She could also have a work shower. I'll touch on that again in Rule #3, but this type of shower usually calls for a group gift. Its during lunch, so very brief, and often just has some finger foods and punch on the break room table. A "couples shower" is another possibility. This is usually for a bride and groom or soon-to-be parents who have known each other long enough that they have the same friends. In this case, both men and women are invited. Each of these showers should be no more than 40 guests (with the exception of the office party, which should include all of the female employees). A shower should not require a rental space. Hold it in a private home or a pretty back yard. Limit it to a couple of hours. Bridesmaids and families spend a small fortune on your day. Don't make them chip in on a Reception Hall too! If you absolutely cannot avoid having one large shower with everyone invited, have people bring unwrapped gifts. Assign someone to creatively display the gifts at the party so everyone can view them at their leisure. Then you can treat the event more like a reception, with a focus on the guest of honor. Still keep it brief. Two hours is plenty of time.

Speaking of bridesmaids, each maid is not required to buy a gift. They are buying the dress, the shoes, the hair, the makeup, the nails, the time, and sometimes the flight and hotel. That is very generous. They may be invited to all of the showers. But they are there to share the time and mingle with your guests--maybe help run the show--but that's it. If they decide to do a group gift, that is a very sweet gesture. You should thank them profusely.

Now that we've touched on guests, I'll introduce Rule #3:

Only those that are invited to the wedding should be invited to the shower. The only exception is the office shower. Don't even think of inviting your Granny's neighbor to the shower because you know she'll give you a great gift unless you're inviting her to the wedding, too. Hey...maybe you'll get two great gifts!

And speaking of gifts...

For weddings, your shower invitation is the only printed item that can include the gift registry information. You can also include it in your website, but by no means can you include gift registries in your save the dates or wedding invitations! Most stores can provide you with a little card that you can include in the shower invitation or you can just print the registry codes, websites, and store names in the invitation verbiage. But only the shower invitations! And please, please, please....if you're going to rent a trailer or some sort of over sized vehicle to transport the gifts after the event, don't park it in front of the entrance. A little decorum, people!

I hope you've enjoyed this brief look at Shower Etiquette. If you've liked what you've read, please subscribe to this blog to read more entries like this one. And if you know anyone who is planning a shower, pass this article along. I'd love to hear your thoughts on the subject. I'll try to make sure your questions get answered and your comments get posted. Thanks for reading!

:) Carolyn

"Life is an occasion...rise to it!"

--Mr. Magorium

Carolyn Arthurs is the owner of All About Events, LLC. Find her and her work at http://www.allaboutevents.net/

Email Carolyn at carolyn@allaboutevents.net

The new look of All About Events!

2011-02-10T20:54:00.000-08:00

The new look of All About Events is finally live on http://www.allaboutevents.net/! See new pictures from some of my favorite events. Stay tuned for even more and for video, too!

All About Events Promotional album 2010

2010-11-21T22:30:00.001-08:00

Click here to view this photo book larger

Welcome to the All About Events event planning blog!

2010-11-21T19:19:00.000-08:00

Follow the All About Events blog to get valuable information on wedding planning, party planning, event ettiquette, helpful tips, and useful resources from top event planning professional Carolyn Arthurs.